Expressing our emotional pain and struggles openly can sometimes feel like we’re burdening those around us. Why is that?

Shared human experiences form the basis of social connection, yet often, we shy away from being honest about our internal feelings.

As a therapist, I embrace and feel honored to sit alongside clients in their emotional suffering. There’s a simple purity in just being present with another person’s pain without immediately trying to fix or solve it. I believe many of us could benefit from learning to just sit with, rather than jump to action. There’s a quote by the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland that I often revisit to remind myself of this lesson:

“Don’t just do something, stand there!”

For me, it’s a reminder to sit with discomfort, to embrace the unknown and ambiguity of the present moment, and to avoid the urge to fix or solve. Sometimes, what we need most is to feel another person’s presence in our pain. The more we practice this approach in our interactions with others, the less we feel the need to avoid emotional discomfort, and the more accepting we become of sharing our own emotional pain.

The next time you encounter emotional discomfort, whether within yourself or expressed by another person, I challenge you to ask yourself: Am I trying to fix or avoid this emotional experience? How can I practice being present and sitting with the discomfort? How can I approach another person’s emotional pain in the same way I’d want them to approach mine?